One roommate is going to get married, one wants to drop out, and I basically have no family anymore. College.
the real winner tonight is the pizza delivery guy who got to hand out pizza to famous actors…at the goddamn oscars
Girl: uhhhhhh I’ll take a coke
Server: alright and for you sir?
Me: nothin this hoe knew she was posed to get water w/ lemon nevermind tho we finna go thank you
true friendship is going from “look at these cute shoes” to “do you like being choked sexually” in under ten minutes